#okay being abandoned is always in the back of my mind but like.... idk. you can fear something without actually anticipating it happening
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i literally cannot escape i accidentally took my phone off power saving mode and AUGH IT MADE MY FUCKING PHONE BACKGROUND I'M SO !!!!
#austin's problems#okay being abandoned is always in the back of my mind but like.... idk. you can fear something without actually anticipating it happening#won the oc custody battle though /lh#it wasnt rlly a battle#i just we were so close literally a month ago and then he disappeared and yeah i've disappeared for a short period of time and fucked up#literally everything upon my return but not this badly#i didn't even know that anything was wrong#what happened to the codependency i'm gonna be so sad if that was one sided#bc just dependency isn't as cool as codependency#not cool as in literally cool jusr#vent in tags#m sad and angry and more sad and having bpd mood swings and#avoiding talking to anyone except the 3 people i currently trust to not leave me and i don't want to annoy any of them soooo. tumblr#but like hi fyo hi baby hi andy i love you all so much thank you for being so good to me even when i'm not worth it
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Hiii! Can you write about Yeosang, San and Wooyoung? But if you're not okay with three of them, choose any two of them!
midnight stroll



summary: In which you find yourself in the hands of some insatiable, obsessed vampire lords. There’s only one way out. genre/pairing: vampire!woosansang x fem!reader, smut wc: 2.8k warnings: SMUT MDNI, dub-con (reader is swayed into it), predator/prey kink, primal play, chase (?) scene, their spit is an aphrodisiac, biting, a lil blood kink, they are in heat (i <3 horny vampires), creampie bom note: idk why i haven’t done this combo before as a person obsessed with carmilla & atz. lmk what u guys think, this is my first time writing a sort of horror (?) trope :)! pls heed warnings & safe reading bbies! enjoy!
You shouldn’t have gone out at night.
Every single bone-chilling story your mother used to frighten you into staying home now replays inside your head. It’s ridiculous how easily every murderous detail comes to your mind now that you’re actively living those stories. Lost little girl, all on her own, in a strange house on a rainy night.
You don’t know why tonight, of all nights, you decided to explore the old mansion that’s always stood tall in your neighborhood. You just felt something was telling you to come and visit. Every time you’d look out of your window, there it was. Alone and creaking for no one, wood rotting at every turn you make. You’re sure it was beautiful and sparkling in its heyday but now with no one to present for, it’s covered in cobwebs and dust.
The loud boom of thunder strikes and you jump through the threshold of a bedroom. The moonlight that shines in through the tall windows illuminates the tears in the blood red canopy. The bed is perfectly made, untouched by rest. The room is surprisingly large, only occupied by a few pieces of complicated furniture. Its marvelousness is enunciated because of its age. The darkness of the room is only broken by a candle on the bedside table.
Already lit.
You hope, pray, that it’s only another curious soul like you. That you haven’t stumbled upon some creep’s secret hideout and inadvertently become his next victim.
You start to back away. The floorboards creak under every step you take. You’re suddenly hyper aware of every breath you take and the speed of your heartbeat. Your body screams to run, nerves fighting and pulling you towards the exit, but your mind is frozen with the fear of being caught.
A harsh wind bites against the glass, making your blood ice cold in its wake and scaring any rationality out of you.
It doesn’t stop. It probably won’t for a while, and you’re forced to come to the realization that you’re stuck here. It’s either be picked up by high-speed winds or be hacked to pieces by whoever’s decided to shack up in this old, abandoned mansion. One is a definite and the other is a chance. You decide that if tonight’s the night you die by axe murder, so be it.
The dead tree branches keep scratching against the windows. Like they’re trying to talk to you, telling you to turn around as you venture deeper into the room. You want to listen.
But there’s a slam. Different from the thunderous weather outside. It’s closer and harsher in your eardrums, accompanied by booming footsteps that make your face fall and doom fill your senses. Whoever it is is making a beeline towards the room you’re in. They’re arguing with someone, frustration evident in their voice.
“Wooyoung, you were supposed to keep your eye on her.”
“It’s fucking pouring outside! How can I see when God is clearly trying to drown us all again?”
Their voices are muffled, but the danger is still clear. They have funny, unrecognizable accents that you’ve never heard before. You can’t really pinpoint it, as you’re focused on figuring out a way to get the fuck out of there.
Your panic rises as you hear the footsteps stop and no more conversation. The pause makes you hurry, fearing they’ve somehow sniffed you out. The greed of whoever built this room gives you no hiding spot, the free and large space being more of a dancefloor than an enclosed bedroom.
The knob to the room turns. With effort, the door creaks open. It introduces fear and an overwhelming panic into your system as your entire body shakes. You just hope to God that they don’t decide to check under the bed.
“I can smell you.”
Your breath catches. You think that if you stop breathing and scrunch your eyes hard enough, you’ll be back in the warmth of your room. But this is real. Every creaking floorboard, every quiet grunt, and every slow step proves it. It’s nearing you, testing the air to find your exact location. You know it’s an it, because how else could it have possibly figured you out so quickly?
“Your heart is racing like a rabbit. Pitter patter. Come out already.”
You cover your mouth to silence the scream of fear that wants to escape. It’s by the bed now. Stopped right behind you, as if it could see you right through the bedsheets and under the springs. The bed creaks as it slowly clambers onto it.
It sees you. It knows what you are and where you are. You’re simply staving off time until it decides to eat you whole. It’s toying with you.
Your body moves on its own as a cold feeling encloses around your ankle, freezing you over. The thing laughs at you, like the way you scramble from it is the most hilarious thing it’s ever seen. Your legs wobble and weaken at the frightening sound, but you run steadfast.
The hallways are long and winding. The only light source as you try to figure a way out of the castle is the lighting that crashes through every few seconds. Your sides start hurting after a few minutes of running in circles. Stuck and hurting in an unfamiliar place is not how you want to spend your evening. You slow down to catch your breath, finding yourself in some sort of lounge room. The fireplace burns on, and you realize the sight of these flames brings you no warmth. It only strikes unrelenting fear in you. The room is nicely decorated and homely, like it was never touched by time. The scene almost looks inviting. Almost, if it weren’t for the hauntingly alluring painting watching over you atop the fireplace. The three men face forward and are creepily stiff, jet black hair gelled back and their dark outfits perfect to a fault. The only odd thing is their eerie, sharp smiles that show off their red-stained, shining teeth. Like a wolf’s last warning before they sink their teeth into you.
You’re sort of hypnotized by the pretty strokes, but a voice breaks you out of your thoughts.
“Little rabbit, why do you run?”
Your legs move on their own once again, but before you can even move an inch, two pairs of arms wrap around you. Their hold is impossibly tight, like they’re still trying to figure out their own limit before they accidentally pop you open. That same voice that laughed at you before is right in your ear now, giggling maniacally and digging their sharp nose into your neck.
They inhale deeply, “Smell that, Yeosang. It’s like nothing I’ve smelled before. Wouldn’t you agree, San?”
The owner of the other voice, San you assume, stands from the dark leather chair facing the fire. He seems otherworldly. Dangerous.
His voice is low, “Little rabbits always smell good.”
The one who you presume to be Yeosang presses himself into you until you’re practically breathing through the same lungs, “Especially when they’re so afraid.”
You shut your eyes in fear when he drags the sharpest canines you’ve ever felt along the warmth of your neck, “Whatever you want. I’ll do whatever you want,”
The way your voice shakes only lures San in. He tuts at you, “You shouldn’t make such promises to us, darling.”
You can feel all three streams of breath on you. They’re all overpowering and oppressive in their own way, crushing your resolve until you’re practically jelly at their touch. The two holding you won’t stop nosing into you and exploring you, hands crawling under your shirt and lifting your skirt as if they have no control over themselves. They’re surprised by your warmth, smitten and addicted to it already. It’s something they haven’t really felt before. At least not recently.
Your breath shakes as their cold hands slide over your tummy, “Just-just let me go, I won’t tell anyone what happened. I promise.”
“Wooyoung!”
Wooyoung seems to grow impatient and drags his wet, languid tongue over your pulse point before biting down gently, restraining himself. He savors the salt of your skin, wondering if that’s how your tears taste. Or if they’re even more delectable.
The wetness of his mouth that sticks to your skin sets you on fire. Your skin is tingly, too warm to be yours now. You know he’s marked you somehow because you can feel your entire body burning up, passion and craving reaching limits you’ve never reached.
San bares his fangs and the glint of them takes your breath away, “I told you to be patient,”
“Oh, just smell her, San. I had to taste her,” Wooyoung’s voice is muffled as he presses his face into your shoulder.
You can feel the heat of his lips crawling up your spine. Yeosang’s hand on your hip leaves a trail of desire everywhere. Everything feels different. Better.
You’re still rational enough to know that something’s not quite right inside of you, “What’s happening to me?”
Your voice is shaky, meek, weak, and San loves it. He can feel his grasp on himself slipping, his mouth salivating at the sight of you being touched and felt.
Ever since their heat began, their bodies only craved you. Out of the hundreds of mindless people in their area, you’re the only one they’ve figured could handle them. There was something about you even they, as supreme beings, couldn’t figure out. They want to keep you as their own personal pet and find out.
Wooyoung is buzzing with energy all over you, “Don’t you feel it? You’re becoming ours,”
Is that what you felt before coming here? Is this where you’re meant to be? Consumed wholly by creatures of the night?
Yeosang’s hand snakes down the band of your skirt, lengthy fingers easily sliding in between your folds. Wooyoung chuckles at your reaction, breathing in your sweet scent, “Little wet rabbit.”
The squelch sounds out into the room and you can hardly believe your ears, “W-wait, please-“
San makes his way to you in two quick strides, suddenly kissing you as if trying to swallow you whole. You feel his voice in the back of your throat, “I can’t take it anymore. I need to ravage you.”
Yeosang’s hand doesn’t stop running over you and playing with your wetness, “I just need to taste you. Just once. Then I’ll stop, rabbit.”
Something happens to you when San’s lips are against you, tongue fighting against yours. Your body surrenders itself to him, to all of the hands that are on you. There isn’t any fear inside of you anymore, in fact, you find the fact that you ever felt any in the first place hilarious. How could you? How could you when Yeosang is so lovingly pleasing you? How could you when Wooyoung is sucking and licking at your neck like it’s a lifeline? How could you when San is kissing you wholly, taking your heart out for himself through your lips? They’re right. This is where you’re supposed to be.
Yeosang can feel the moment you truly surrender yourself to them, the wetness between his fingers overflowing now. He attempts to rub at your bundle of nerves, but grows frustrated when your tight skirt gets in the way of his movements. Before you can say anything, he rips the skirt off you, tearing into the material like it’s nothing to him.
He throws the fabric somewhere into the room before kneeling down in front of you. You’re too enraptured by San’s lips to notice him, and he pouts at that.
Yeosang holds your trembling thighs and licks a long stripe onto your pussy lips, looking up at you with sweet, begging eyes. When you gasp and look down at the feeling of his tongue against you, there’s newfound vigor in his face. Yeosang sucks onto your lips, the taste of you quelling his need. He doesn’t care how messy he gets as he spreads your juices over your thighs and all over his mouth, moaning as he feels how utterly desperate your hole is. He plays with your entrance, trying to figure out what makes your knees buckle. As his lips move to depravely kiss at your clit, you almost fall down with him.
San’s strong arms catch your waist easily, “That’s it, little rabbit. Give yourself to us.”
You nod your head and Wooyoung laughs obnoxiously at your pathetic answer, “Look at the poor thing. She’s sopping wet.”
Yeosang smiles dreamily up at you with your cum on his face. He wipes at his face but it doesn’t do much, the glint shining in the light of the thunderstorm. He licks his lips hungrily, “You taste sweet. Like candy.”
San growls impatiently, bending you over a beautifully carved sofa. You feel bad staining it with your pleasure, but the owners don’t seem to mind. His cock, large and forbidding, presses against your entrance. He leans over your back until his nose reaches that sweet point connecting your jaw and neck. The one that revealed everything about you and your sweetness through your electrifying scent. He feels his addiction grow with every inhalation.
He takes a big breath as his cock finally slides into you, every inch adding onto the tingling satisfaction passing through all of his body as he nestles himself inside of you. His cock has no trouble slipping through the wetness that spills out of you, the moist warmth of your pussy filling his gut with an unfamiliar burn. His hand moves up along the front of your body, grabbing tightly onto your jaw to hold you in place. His sharp claws dig into your blushing cheek.
San fucks you with a barely-there restraint, huffing into your ears as he drills into you. He seems to have forgotten his past hesitance, in fear of scaring you. Now all that’s left is his raw need and desire for you, this intense ache taking over as he continues stretching you open. Your hole feels better than he ever could imagine, ever could bear. Every squeeze you give sends him reeling, his gut tightening with every thrust.
Wooyoung replaces San’s hand on your jaw, puckering your lips and laughing as your entire body jolts against San. He bares his fangs with a wide smile, razor-sharp and primed for poaching. He licks down your neck, savoring the taste of your humanity, your beating heart. The constant song within you is entrancing.
Wooyoung can’t resist. His canines sink into your shoulder, his eyes rolling back into his head when he finally gets a taste of the real you. It’s exhilarating, dizzying. Frenzied and fervent now, Wooyoung licks at the fresh wound he’s made, the tiniest dribble of red trickling down. Every one of your liquids is just so, so intoxicating.
He feels the effects of you, “My delicious pet rabbit. Mine, mine, mine.”
You whine against Wooyoung as your mind is clouded with pleasure and pain, San’s thick cock still hitting deeper and sparking your gummy walls with an intense gratification. There’s a meek voice in the back of your head telling you to wake up, but it’s quickly drowned out as Yeosang kisses slow, lithe kisses along the skin of your opposite shoulder. He’s watching as you’re treated like a piece of meat by San, teary-eyed and trembling, and can’t believe he’s ever gone without you. Without the smell of your heady, inflaming sex filling his senses or the sight of your abused, puffy pussy.
He takes another giant breath in of your rousing scent before biting down, his canines piercing you just as Wooyoung’s did. Yeosang shudders at the taste of you, a bright, addicting flavor. You’re simply made for them.
He mutters as you moan against him, “What a slutty little rabbit you are.”
The second Yeosang’s fangs rip through you, San fills your gummy walls. His cum marks and ruins you for anyone else. He growls animalistically against you as you tighten and squeeze, biting into his fist and drawing enough blood that it drips down from his arm onto your back. He still tries to hold back for you. Even in his most raw and savage, with his hips still moving and deliriously fucking his cum back into you and making a mess, he tries not to cause you pain. Not anymore at least.
San’s gravelly voice reaches down to your bones, his entire body tightening up against you as more and more cum jolts into you, “There you go, little rabbit. Stuffed full. Don’t you feel better?”
You feel it dripping between your thighs. The pearlescent liquid that used to make you feel scandalized, demeaned. It gives you a purpose now, to be used as their rabbit. Their meal to be devoured.
#ateez#ateez x reader#ateez imagines#ateez fic#ateez oneshot#ateez scenarios#ateez smut#ateez texts#ateez fanfic#ateez wooyoung#ateez yeosang#ateez san#kang yeosang#kang yeosang smut#kang yeosang imagines#kang yeosang x reader#choi san#choi san smut#choi san imagines#choi san x reader#jung wooyoung#jung wooyoung smut#jung wooyoung imagines#jung wooyoung x reader
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laying my coveted collection of three (3) muppet dvds down at your feet/general offering table. my soul for some bluestreak, if you wanna. if not then enjoy the muppets- but! i never knew they did cover songs for stuff like "got my mind set on you" by george harrison and kokomo until recently!! or that bluestreak brought "the muppets take manhattan" with him onto the lost light!! idk i really like the mental image of this giant sci-fi robot next to kermit the frog, not doing anything in specific or whatever, just... vibing. if some cybertronians think humans are like weird protoforms, i cant help but wonder what they think of muppets, ykwim??? either way, have a happy new year!!
Blue needs some love and he’s such a goober sometimes. I can see him absently humming Rainbow Connection

Where I Belong Pt 10
Bluestreak x Reader
• Carrying you back to his quarters, he absently rubs a servo against you and warms when you hook an arm around it to hug him. “Sorry about worrying you. I didn’t want to bother Ratchet and it wasn’t really that bad. I’ve seen worse and-” Trailing off when you look up at him. Because he knows he’s rambling, but you don’t huff at him. Don’t tell him to shut up. You never do and every time you don’t his spark aches with it. With all the things he wants to say, but doesn’t dare. “Sorry.”
• When he smiles that self-depreciating smile, that sense of a lost boy lifts through you again. He’s older than you, much older, but still it’s there in the fear you see in his optics sometimes. An unsettled feeling you don’t know how to deal with, but that makes you think the smiles and chatter on the surface are all for show. That he’s still reaching for you like he had that first time, desperate and afraid. “Don’t apologize. Just take care of yourself. I like having you around.”
• Do you? No one else does and his servos flex around you as he lets himself into his quarters and sits on the side of his berth with you. Reluctant to give up your warmth. Feels bad about clinging to you like he does, but can’t make himself stop. Optics shuttering as he braces for the rejection, he mass shifts. Hears you yelp as you end up in his lap and he wraps his arms around you, chin on top of your head. “I like having you around, too.”
• Heart racing, you shudder and try to shake off that awful feeling of falling. Not even sure why you’re surprised by anything at this point when you live with a giant alien robot. Shrinking? Sure. Why not? “Warn me before you do that next time.” Or you might get sick on him. Distracted when he so gently curls his fingers around your wrist and pulls it to him. Watching him line up his palm with yours and even smaller, his hand dwarfs yours.
• “Sorry.” You’ve always been so small and fragile to him, but putting himself closer to your size really drives it home. Your hand so tiny in his. “I just wanted to hold you. And I can’t normally because you’re so small and you’re still small. I feel like you’re going to break,” he murmurs, embarrassed. You’re always touching his servos, hugging them, trying to comfort him. He wanted to return it, but still can’t. Like he can’t begin to explain how much he loves you for being with him. For not abandoning him when he’d needed you. For keeping him from being so alone.
• “I’m not made of glass.” Shifting more to sit across his lap, you reach back and find his other arm and pull it around you. Encouraging him to hold you like he’d wanted and you lay your head against him, seeing his door wings lift from the corner of your eye. “See?” You can hear his internal systems and the thrum of his spark as he cautiously rests his hand on your hip. “This is okay.” Breath catching as his head dips and his cheek brushes yours. That hand still curled around yours tugging so he can brush his mouth against the inside of your wrist, his optics still shuttered. That gentle touch spreading warm through you.
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Hi☺️🌸 TW for this request: loneliness, angst, depression.
You are 100% allowed to not take this request and if you choose to do so, I would totally understand ❤️
Can we please get a series or even a one shot on how each of the Obey me! brothers (separately or together or maybe a mixture of both) would react to an mc that's just so use to not having any friends or anyone that particularly cares about what they're up to or what's on their mind/how they feel (on top of also being bullied)? An mc with a loneliness that runs so deep that that they end up constantly feeling abandoned and forgotten. For whom none of the friends that they've had in the past ever cared to maintain a relationship with them, which really aggravated their pre-existing rejection sensitive dysphoria (AuDHD). And this mc cares so much and put so much love into their relationships with others. This mc loves hard and was told throughout their life, that that was bad. And no matter what they do, people always end up leaving them or making them feel like they're not good enough - sometimes because of circumstances, sometimes because people (the friends) think they're "too much" or "weird", sometimes because they (the friends) genuinely just don't care. Because that's how insignificant MC is.
I want to read about an mc who gets surprised when (one of) the brothers decide to sit with them while they're doing something mundane, like homework or studying or colouring (idk i love colouring). And an mc who sleeps holding a pillow or with the pillow against their back, so that they can feel less alone. And can we see the brothers react to all of it? Why would they care about what MC is doing? Do they need something? Is something wrong?
Sorry, I know it's a lot and I really didn't mean to info/trauma dump on you🙏🏽 I just really want to read something that makes me feel seen and represented. Because I'm speaking from experience, unfortunately. And can we also make the mc gender neutral, if that's okay with you?
Even if you don't end up taking my request, thank you for taking the time to read it🙏🏽 I really appreciate it ❤️💖
Okay friend, I am picking one brother for this, and I picked Mammon! Unfortunately I so deeply understand this ask, as someone who has BPD. I desperately need soul crushing devotion and love in my life. Anyway.
So, how would Mammon react to a lonely MC?
I think at first, Mammon would brush off some habits of yours as weird-human-traits until he puts the pieces together. I think the first time it clicks, is the first time he REALLY eats lunch with you, of his own volition. He usually does, not JUST because he's your watchdog, but because ehe does enjoy it. And then, one afternoon he sits with you after not doing so for a few days, and the genuine surprise when you turn your head is a little baffling to him! Your smile lights up a little more than usual, and he notices the sparkle in your eyes. He knows by now that he's smitten, but today is the day he pieces together how lonely you seem.
From then on, he prods a little. Not gently, but gentle for him. Either way, whether you're forthcoming or not, he chooses to push a little more. More sleepovers, more time together, even if it's. most of your time. You'll be able to notice how his comments about humans seem to slip off his tongue more quietly for a while, and then they seemingly disappear almost all together. He does really notice and take these things to heart, especially for you. When you seem more isolated, or even when he's just busy, you'll find that the little crows seem to gather around you during lunch or homework time, and sometimes you'll get a little pebble!
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You know what we need? Batfam Bloodbourne au
Preferably where they're all sent to The Dream but separately and when they all kill gherman and become baby great ones they come back to Gotham and it's Their Dream now. Just Gotham or the world and Gotham is Home and the most like Yharnam, up to you. But I'd love to see them struggle through the brutality, or make peace with it quickly for some (in my mind Tim would be the most stable, Jason would be okay but not great, Tim just seems so,,, adaptable to me, the most insatiable for knowledge so the most accepting of the consequences of getting that knowledge, pros outweigh the cons kinda deal) with the way others were changed and just unsavable. The people of Yharnam are beasts now and the kindest way to deal with them is to put them down even if it's not permanent. And then come out of it irrevocably changed themselves, more than just mentally. The effects it has on them and the world around them. How The Dream ended, but theirs just began and what if it starts in Gotham and slowly spreads? But they're the only great ones in this world so there's no old blood to corrupt people but that doesn't stop death being...odd. Unless they share their blood in experiments to Know what it would do and if they can use it safely for those they care about. (mad scientist Tim my beloved)
Do you see my vision? It's beautiful
It's wonderful.
Like no joke, I adore Bloodborne, I Love it (Even if I can't play it thanks to getting distracted by all the details in the surroundings & then get murdered lol)
And I wouldn't say Tim is the most adaptable, they all are, but Tim? Compartmentalizes, looks at things logically, straight up turns off his panic at times like it's a switch. But I am also very weak to mad scientist Tim. Even if they probably don't let him do human experiments (not that it stops self-experimentation sometimes)
Gosh I love this. Them still ending up found-family while these utterly horrible things happen around and to them. I wonder if they sometimes take a moment in the dreams and whisper about what they remember before this Living Nightmare. Names they don't know the faces of but know they were important to them. Memories they cling to as they try not to lose what is left of their humanity.
Oh my god, them being the only Great Ones after killing the previous ones? Wonderful idea, I adore it. I bet even if they can take human form still it would be... off. And the more one's Insight is? The more they can see that they're Other.
God the imagery of like, Gotham's moon always being red and thick fog settling across the city each night as their Dream begins is amazing. And I bet that they relish it. I bet they're relieved for normal murder and crime, compared to the Plague of Beasts they had been dealing with what felt like years. Time gets so meaningless with an Endless night full of Deaths over and over.
I bet Gotham looks even more Gothic than before. Actually, you know what? This would be perfect for a No Man's Land situation. For the city to be abandoned only to be held afloat by newborn Gods who no longer quite understand the humans, not with how long the Hunt has stretched on, but care all the same. Idk I just really like this idea in general lol. I am weak to eldritch AUs and Bloodborne is glorious.
#ask answered#Bloodborne Au#batman au#batman#dc#dcu#cryptid batman#cryptid batfam#batfamily#cryptid batfamily#I wonder if Tim has a few birds he fed his blood#I wonder if x-ray machines would show their heads Lined with Eyes#I wonder if cameras don't show the human forms but glimpses of something Other#God i love the hunter's armors and weapons and everything#Oh my god would this mean Batman- they all deserve trick weapons but does this mean batman has a big fukin axe#I fully believe Dick would have something like the bloodletter#Damian has the chikage probably#hyperfixation no don't make me obsess over this-#Bus seriously gimme more ideas please I adore this#bloodborne#bloodborne crossover#bloodborne au
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𝕄𝕀𝔾𝕌𝔼𝕃 𝕆'ℍ𝔸ℝ𝔸 𝕏 𝔾ℕ! ℝ𝔼𝔸𝔻𝔼ℝ ℍ𝔼𝔸𝔻ℂ𝔸ℕ𝕆ℕ𝕊
Okay, in my mind, I see it this way:
This man lost all of what he cherished and, after which, he made it his work to ensure what happened to him would never happen again. The thing is - it's very personal.
He works so hard not because he's born a workoholic (Idk about comic Miguel, but rn Im talking about atsv Miguel and what we've seen of him) but because hes hurting and feeling guilty, and there's just so much mental baggage to unpack.
🧛🏽Of course he'll be shitting his spider-pants from the sheer thought of having someone close to him again or having any attachments. But if this man ends up with a S/O somehow, it would mean there's already a lot of work done with him opening up and getting attached and, in this case, his priorities will change too.
🧛🏽I don't see him ignoring his SO or abandoning them for work or being mean to them for no reason, he'll get a totally new set of priorities. And his SO is surely his number one priority.
🧛🏽He will try to prioritize work, but if you call him he'll just drop everything he's been doing. (he sure will complain that he needs to do his very important job and all)
🧛🏽He wouldn't ever want to take his anger out on you, but this man does have anger issues. He'll try to manage it to best of his ability if he's around you - he'll just be grumpy and try to be civil with you while holding back his desire to punch a hole through a wall.
If he's furious he won't talk much, will just be frowning silently, he may sound a bit rude atm, he still wouldn't want to harm or upset you. If he ever shouts at you he'll be quick to apologize.
🧛🏽He doesn't strike me as a jealous type, he's concerned for your safety, not for your loyalty. He wont even think about it. Unless you'll give him a rock solid reason to.(but why?)
🧛🏽He'll have separation anxiety soo bad he'll cuff you to himself. This man can't breathe freely if you're out of his line of sight.
🧛🏽He is a family-oriented man. He craaveesss family, this man needs comfort so badly.
🧛🏽He tries to treat his SO as an independent and capable individual, no matter if they are a spider person or not, he respects them. He tries and he fails not to be controlling and protective.
❤️Love languages :
Quality time
"I want a hundred of your time, you're mine."
As I said, he will be glued to your side. He'll have you in his office while he works, just having you around is comforting, even when you two aren't talking. Just hearing your heartbeat and breathing makes his heart feel lighter. To have you in sight and to know you're safe is what it takes for him to stay calm and focused.
Touching.
Two words: touch starved(or is it one word?)
He just likes to feel any part of your body against any part of his body. He'll love it if you fall asleep on his lap while he works (I have no idea if Miguel has a chair in his lair but let's imagine he has one). If you spoil him with light touches, caressing his skin gently, patting his head, running your hand through his hair, he will crumble.
He will always be silently begging for your touch, like a cat that wants headpats, tries to hide it to save its dignity, but fails miserably by being too obvious. He is a cat.
#miguel fanfic#miguel spiderverse#miguel o'hara#miguel x reader#miguel o'hara x reader#atsv miguel#miguel headcanons#miguel o'hara headcanons#spiderman 2099#miguel o'hara x gn!reader#miguel o'hara x male reader#miguel o'hara x fem!reader#spiderman across the spiderverse#spiderverse#atsv fanfiction#atsv headcanons#spiderverse x reader#across the spiderverse
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TGSTLTH related
Ok so I decided to do it here cuz I don't know will AO3 allow me to write essay hahahahah 😂😂😂
I don't even know how to start this. I've been reading fics for 13 years straight, like I don't remember the period of my life where I didn't read them cuz I always have some ship active and I'm crazy BL fan. Only a small number of them can make me crazy to the point I don't wanna sleep, eat, skipping my obligations, killing the pain and your sebaciel did everything. I haven't felt like this reading fic..,maybe ever? This is totally another level of me being fascinated by some writer.
I adore sebaciel, I'm in fandom since 2016 but the biggest problem I had with their fics is that - either people go too much OOC with them orr they rush up the things between them, going quickly with sex and feelings. It bothered me so much so I was crawling for good SC fics as crazy!!
After some break with SC, I came back to ao3 and saw your long fic. I started reading it but I dropped it after 3 chapters, I got bored cuz I thought you are gonna just re-type manga and do classic thing which another people do. Quickly, I got disappointed with another one and idk how but I decided to give your fic one more chance and dear lord......that was one of the best thing I have ever read. Maybe even the best.
Like, how smart are you? What's your IQ? Your manage to explain me some things about Kuro plot which I haven't udnerstand by myself. And the way you write Sebaciel relationship. That's everything I have ever wanted. Everything. They have normal conversation and that's it, that's all I need cuz there is everything. I feel electric every time when they talk, fight, do things together, goood the little touches svbjhsdjvbvbvbvbvbsdjvhbdf. I was tense whole fic. I read it for like 10 days, abandon everything until I finished it and now I feel sad ahahhaahha. But you are really something special, cuz I always used to say that manga itself is the best fiction cuz Yana knows the best how to create good Sebaciel energy. You, next to Yana, did the best job. You kept them as they are, never broke the character, and that's what I am most grateful. Slow burn, with drama and angst, love and attention, all misunderstanding, you put all necessary spices for 5 star meal. My fav part is when Ciel told Sebastian to add slamming doors to his most dramatic moments of his life ahahahahahahhaha 😂😂 I laughed like crazy, they are so precious♥ And I really wanted kiss to happen when Ciel lied Sebastian about another demon, that was sooo svbjhsvjhjhvbdf. But okay, you know the best, I trust you fully with this♥
The fact that they are ready to kill each other before they have normal conversation about their feeling is my fetish. I am in love with toxic things. Ciel ready to throw all game just to prove Sebastian that his value is not only his soul, right after he told himself for 1000 times he needs to stay on distance..... I LOVE ITTTT!!! I also need to say that you find PERFECT balance for good plot and romance. Your games and their cases...I just don't know, deep bow for you queen🔥💯After all, you didn't retype drama ahahaha but you manage to keep it canon without changing anything but still adding your spices so it's not ordinary Kuro plot we see every day....
I just have one question. From time to time, I was like a Bard ahahhaha, so sick of their games and my head hurting me, but on a good way. I am clear about Ciel but what about Sebastian and his disgust for Ciel's nicer, soft, emotional side? I know Ciel doesn't have it a lot, but would Sebastian still be grossed out about it as he was at the beginning of a contract or not? Keeping in mind that he is more and more obsessed with a boy?
So, that's all. I don't know how to use Patreon/PayPal, but for you I'll try cuz I only have credit card and that's all I know ahhahaha, I like to keep money in my hands😂 I'm sad about the situation in your country and all under - war countries. It's not bringing any good for anyone, specially for civilians. I hope you are okay and I wish you alll the best, the good karma must hit you really quickly cuz you made one person really, really happy here♥
Looking forward how will you finish this story, have a nice day❤
PS - this is the longest comment for fic I have ever left ahhaha, it's crazy how you got me sooo hyped up bjcvsdghvbds.
Hi! Ooh, thank you so much for your amazing, wonderful essay! I can't tell you how happy it made me! I think the electricity was already started being cut off when I got it, so I could see I have some really lengthy ask, but it wouldn't load. It was the torture of the most delicious kind :D
Like you, I've been reading fics for ages now, and the moments where I find some fantastic story that won't let me sleep or work or even blink are always the happiest and the brightest spots I remember. So it's extremely flattering to know that my story has become something similar to other people.
I love writing about smart characters, but most of them are definitely smarter than me! The benefit is that since I'm writing, I can think and plan everything in advance. In real life, I only wish I were as quick-witted and inventive. Alas, the best ideas and arguments come to me when they are no longer needed.
I love slow burns, and I love characters who abhor the idea of expressing their feelings, so Ciel and Sebastian have the most perfect dynamic in my eyes. I feel like I could spend the eternity just enjoying their Gothic world with their games, arguments, plots, and so on. Them antagonizing each other only to instantly team up against the common enemy is my most favorite thing in the world.
As for your question, right now, Sebastian would be thrilled if Ciel were to show a softer and more vulnerable side - at least in relation to him. Well, a part of him would feel the automatic need to mock him for it anyway, some habits don't die easily, but Sebastian's feelings have evolved a lot, plus Ciel is cold more often than he is not. So Sebastian treasures every word of praise, every hint of appreciation and need because they are so rare - he's come to crave them, and he has memorized all known cases of them by heart.
And no worries about supporting me! I really appreciate you taking your time to leave such a fantastic review, it made my day!
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Too late (part II)
Once Rhysand invites Eris to the winter solstice, you got all the attention from the heir of the Autumn Court, making a jealous Azriel.
i almost gave up posting this bc idk if it’s good, but here it is 😖
warnings: a little angst and kinda suggestive at the end
if you find any mistakes please let me know!
part I
[masterlist]
No one knew where Azriel was.
He simply disappeared after the disaster during the winter solstice. All his clothes and weapons were left in his room, except the Truth Teller. Eveything was untouchable, exactly where he left it before leaving Velaris.
You could feel Rhysand and Feyre were trying to hide something from you. They told you not to worry, that Azriel would come back soon, but you didn’t believe them. You could sense they weren’t sure if Az would actually come back.
You couldn’t understand why the inner circle was acting so weird, even Cassian seemed to be more careful with his jokes when you were around. Like you could break if something wrong was said.
You two got closer over the years, especially after you started training with him during the mornings. You got used to being woken up by him, calling you lazy for still being in bed. Azriel's calm face became the first thing you saw as soon as you opened your eyes, with the shadows always prowling around him.
But now, as the Spymaster, no one would find him unless he wanted to.
During that week, which seemed to be the longest time of your life, Eris sent a lot of letters and gifts. At that point you received a hole collection of jewelry made from fire stone and an invitation to dinner with him at the Autumn Court. Still, you couldn’t feel excited to see Eris. So you ignored all the letters and left all the gifts abandoned under your bed.
The only thought in your mind my was Azriel.
Sometimes you felt like your heart was being crushed, and it hurt like someone’s pain was being added to yours.
You’re feeling miserable and didn’t understand why Azriel’s suddenly disappearance was affecting you that much. You two were only friends, that was all. Even if you felt a deeper feeling for him, you knew he would never like you that way.
When Eris started to give you attention, you saw a chance to get over Azriel. But even with all your efforts to love the male, your feeling for Az didn’t go away.
At some point, you started to have nightmares. You keep dreaming about Azriel being hurt by someone, Azriel being killed or simply never being found again, leaving you alone in this world forever.
Today you woke up scared, letting a cry of despair escape from your mouth. You still could see the image of your dream in your head, of Azriel’s lifeless body laying in a dark forest.
Panic still spread throughout your mind. The image refused to leave. You wanted to scream, you wish to go back in time and fix everything, to tell Azriel how you felt.
“(Y/n)?” The familiar voice said, making your heart beat faster.
Azriel was standing in front of your door with a worried look on his face. He walked in your direction with caution, like he was scared that you would disappear if any sudden movement was made.
“Az?” You asked, afraid that was just another dreams and you would woke up at any second just to find out he was still missing.
He sat on the edge of the bed.
“I heard you screaming” He asked with a low hoarse voice.
“I’m fine, it was just… a nightmare.”
“I understand.” Azriel looked at you, trying to find the right words to say next “I’m sorry to enter in your room like this, I just… I just thought you could be in danger.”
“It’s okay.” You wanted to get closer to him, to talk everything that was running your mind. “I was worried about you, why did you left like that? What happened at the winter solstice?”
The questions left your mouth before you could stop them.
Azriel’s shadows were dancing around him, slowly approaching your body, as if they were happy to finally see you again.
“I’m sorry for that as well” Azriel let a sigh left his mouth “I left because I’m a selfish bastard. I wish I could say I have a honorable reason for it, but I don’t. The truth is I left because I couldn’t see you near Eris anymore”
You tried to digest his words, finally starting to understand.
“Honestly, at that point I wasn’t giving a shit for Rhysand’s alliance with Eris. And I should, because he’s my friend, my brother and my High Lord.” He finally looked inside your eyes “But I can’t watch my mate with another male, especially him.”
The shock spread throughout your body.
Mate.
That’s what he said. You’re his mate.
“Azriel.” You said, breaking the distance and taking his hands with your own.
He felt a shiver go through his spine. The way you hold his scarred hands without hesitation, your eyes carried with affection. Even if they’ve caused only pain and suffering in the last few centuries for the others.
For the first time, he didn’t felt like a monster, like a villain of someone’s story. He could be the villain to a lot of people, but not to you. Azriel would never be able to hurt you.
“Let me finish first.” Azriel interrupted before you could say anything “I’m back because of you, to fight for you. I don’t want to believe it’s too late for us.”
“Why didn’t you tell me before?” You said “I’m so stupid, if I wasn’t so scared of telling you how I felt, none of that would’ve happened”
“How you felt?” He looked confused. “You have feelings for me?”
“How can the Spymaster be so oblivious of what is infront of your nose?” You said, laughing “Yes, I do have feelings for you, but I never thought you felt the same way. I was so blind that I didn’t even felt the bond.”
But it was there, filling your chest. Uniting your soul to Azriel’s. That’s why you felt so miserable in the last days, you could feel his despair echoing with yours through the bond, almost creating a sad melody.
“(Y/n)… please don’t tell me that I got into the biggest existencial crises of my life just because I was too scared to tell you about the bond. When I could have you long time ago.”
“Don’t feel bad, because I’m afraid we both did the same thing.” You said and he laugh.
Hesitant, he lift one of his hands and slightly caressed your face. His shadows touched your soft skin, moving around your arms, making you feel a tickle.
“You’re my mate, Azriel. And I’m only yours.” You finally said the words and he looked at you with a indecipherable expression. “I’ve always been yours. And you’re right, it’s not too late for us”
“(Y/n)” A groan left his mouth “Since the first time I put my eyes on you, you’ve conquered me in every possible way. I’m yours and you’re mine, and I won’t let anyone get in the middle.”
Azriel moved his hands to your neck and you instantly whimpered in anticipation. His eyes darkened when he heard it, and he finally broke the distance between you two, kissing you deeply. He quickly pushed you to his lap, trying to get you the closer he could, and put his hands into your waist.
“Time to claim what’s mine, love.” Azriel said with a lust in his eyes.
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heyyyy hiii ★ i’m the person who commissioned you!!! (holidayroadkill) teehee ^_^
okay here we gooo!! apologies if this is long. it might be. oops!
basics: my (fakee) name is arcade and my pronouns are anything at all really, im on the shorter side (5’1”) and average weight! my hair is dyed black & my eyes are prettyyyy blue!! on top of that im really white i need some sun… uhh,, im partially deaf! yeah
style: i guess it could be summed up as a 90s/2000s skater style?? my outfits are really never much though >_< i like 2 keep it kinda simple lel
personality: okayy hooray so!! i’m a little shy at first but i love making friends, love talking 2 ppl, and love being around others!! it makes me very happy :] i have a huge fear of being alone, abandoned or ignored, so i hold my connections close to me im very loyal!! i’m pretty easygoing but it is verrryyy easy for me to become frustrated or overwhelmed,, and i do tend to get snappy with people, but i always apologize, TRUST! ❤️ i like to think i’m empathetic, i think you should always #killthemwithkindness 😋😋😋 on that note i’m also pretty sensitive and tend to take things personally oops, i care a lot about what other people think of me & i’m very aware of how i present myself (so a little self-absorbed??) which is kind of a curse! i can be nosy since i like 2 know everything about everyone and i’m horrible at keeping secrets… oug. umm my friends say i’m funny n i like ppl who can laugh!! my humor is on the more sarcastic/teasing side. sometimes my anxieties hold me back from doing the things i wanna do, but i try to fight it as best as i can ^_^
likes/dislikes: i’m really open-minded and willing to research/try most things, but some things i don’t like are: loud noises!! math!! cold/distant or harsh judgy people!!! crowded spaces with lots of ppl!! being bored, doing nothing!! too many rules!! pure silence!! yerpp.. uhh as for likes! all animals, the outdoors, collecting knives, baking, gaming (specifically sandbox, rpg, top down shooters, or fps!) listening 2 music, anything artsy (specifically photography and writing!!), microbiology i love science a LOT actually, conspiracy theories/extraterrestrials/myths those kinda things, i also enjoy spooky stuff like haunted locations and whatnot >_> ROBOTS!!! love robots so much. teehee. and old consoles! oh dreamcast how i love you
hobbies: as i mentioned before art! gaming! listening to music! baking! you know. i love hanging out with people a lot, uhhh… yeah :] biking i guess… i don’t know ^_^ soryr 💔 beliebe it or not i DO like going to concerts… i’ll accept loud noises/crowds if it’s for music <3
love languages: i’m a sucker for physical affection & quality time!! i guess the one i’d care for the least is gift giving?? idk. i don’t mind,, but i’d feel bad not repaying it.
i don’t think im missing anything..?? i’m an enfp 5w7! eek if i’m missing anything i’ll send it in another ask >_< thank you so so much!!! 🫶 u da best!
SMILES I got to work as soon as I came back from my job…first off thank you so much again for deciding to commission me, it’s not every day that i get commed for writing !! And thank you for trusting me with something as random as a Matchup…hopefully it’s of your liking!
And secondly, let’s get into it…here’s your match!! (And your fic!!)
I match you with…
Jevil!
Okay, okay, I know what you’re thinking: “Jevil? What could I possibly have in common with Jevil?” and don’t you worry! I’m here to give you an exhaustive answer!
We’ll start from the fact that…you are an agglomerate of personality traits, to be quite honest! You’re shy, though at the same time you crave connection with others. You’re snappy, but you catch on to other people’s feelings quite fast. I could go on, but what I’m trying to say is that you…are interesting! And Jevil loves that about you, he likes a unique personality.
Tease him, honestly! Because he absolutely teases you back, and throws a handful of jokes you can laugh at at you all the time. He doesn’t really take anything to heart, it’s very hard to get to him especially if he can tell you’re just being silly or sarcastic, so you can go all out! Although he might do the same at the beginning, Jevil quickly catches on on the fact that you take things personally…he’s careful with jokes that include you, and tries not to touch on certain matters that might upset you. After all, would he really be a good jester if he didn’t accept a bit of a challenge in what he can jest about?
Jevil likes your nosiness, it’s cute and fun to him, plus he might be the nosiest guy around. It’s common occurrence for you and him to barge into your friends’ conversations that are supposed to be private, and you get labelled as the nosy couple, of course. You two definitely gossip like teens while doing mundane things that would otherwise be boring and, speaking of which, Jevil is by your side all the time!
You’re baking something yummy? He’s there, purposefully making a mess to amuse you. You’re drawing? He’s drawing as well, although very badly, just to make you laugh. You’re dyeing your hair? He’s helping you, even though he’s admittedly not very good with all the patience that it takes. He’s omnipresent, and you don’t mind it one bit seeing that you greatly enjoy company and despise silence. He’s never really quiet, always commenting on whatever you two are doing, and he is quite the (pleasant) distraction!
Jevil also enjoys that you are super open-minded and seem to have a lot of hobbies and options for things you can do together; he’s particularly like to accompany you while you visit a haunted place, if you actually haven’t done that already yet, though you can bet he’ll tease you and try to scare you for the fun of it while you’re there…! He’s also quite intrigued by your knife collection, you’re most likely the first person he’s met who has one.
He might try videogames…while lying upside down on the couch, purposefully messing with the controller’s buttons just for the heck of it, honestly. But he can stop if that annoys you, and just watch you instead! What you can’t really stop him from doing though is commenting on every single thing that’s happening in-game…!
You’re lucky if you say you love physical affection and quality time…as I mentioned before, Jevil loves spending time with you no matter what you’re doing. He’s also a big cuddle bug most of the time, and your touch is really the only thing that helps his thoughts quiet down a little. Usually cynical and perhaps even a little out of it sometimes, Jevil only really trusts you, and because of this he can be clingy or even protective towards you.
He often wraps his tail around your arm or leg when you’re anxious or feeling upset, otherwise he simply positions himself in your arms. He might not be the best at reassurance, but he does encourage you when anxiety is stopping you from doing something, and tries to get you to laugh, of course.
He’s not the best at gifts either, honestly; most of his presents for you consist in very random things that made him think of you, however you don’t really understand the connection and sometimes he doesn’t even have one, either…! Although he does appreciate when you take the time to gift him something yourself, and keeps it as a very prized possession.
You quietly tap your fingers along with the beat of the song you’re listening to; for a nice change, you have decided to wake up early and bake some of your and Jevil’s favourite cookies, mainly to surprise him when he wakes from his slumber. With him being a huge foodie, you’re sure he’s going to appreciate the gesture.
You check the timer you’ve set, which signals that they’re going to be ready in a couple of minutes, and so you rush to clean, wash and dry all the tools you’ve used to avoid leaving a mess for your boyfriend to see as soon as he wakes up.
You barely have the time to register the sound of the kitchen door opening above your music;
“WHAT DO YOU DO, DO?”
“Eek!” you squeak, your shoulders tensing at the sudden, loud voice; you turn around in a jiffy and release a relieved breath upon noticing it’s just Jevil, squinting and with his tail tiredly hanging low, “Oh! It’s you…jeez, it’s only ten and you’re already this loud?”
Jevil doesn’t fail to notice your teasing tone, and shoots you a grin;
“OOPS…so?” his voice lowers to make you more comfortable.
As if on cue, the timer surprises you two with a ding!, signaling that the cookies are ready. He observes curiously as you carefully pull the tray of cookies out of the oven.
“OH! YOU MADE THOSE FOR ME, ME?” he’s back to his usual tone of voice, though now that you know it’s him, you don’t particularly mind; “YOU’RE A BONBON!”
Despite you telling him to just sit at the kitchen table and wait for you to serve breakfast, he insists on helping you prepare everything after a good stretch to wake himself up enough; he twirls around with the tablecloth, juggles a little with the cookies and nearly gives you an heart attack as he pretends to throw your empty glasses behind him before swiftly catching them with his tail.
“Do that one more time and I’m never baking for you ever again!!” You say sternly.
“STRANGE, THE SAME THREAT ONCE AGAIN.” he sneers, knowing that you actually enjoy his weird little antics.
Once the table is all set and breakfast is served, you contently dig in, his pointy ears perking up at the sweet taste of your freshly baked cookies.
You two discuss how well you’ve slept and which activities you have planned for the day while sitting next to one another, with Jevil’s tail softly wrapped around your wrist in silent thankfulness.
Commission type: matchup + short fic Banner by: yours truly Divider by: strangergraphics
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hi!! idk if u still take requests and i also don't know if ur comfortable writing about depression and suicidal thoughts/ideations? it's comforting reading someone have someone be there for them during those times so if u could write something with ghost like that i would absolutely appreciate it, love ur writing, xoxo!! 💕
I’ve been there, I hope you’re having a good day when you’re reading this, no matter what that looks like for you<3
Made reader a medic because I love the medic reader trope more than some family members
Warnings: Suicidal ideation, panic attacks, nightmares
Save you - Ghost x Reader
“MEDIC! WE NEED MEDIC NOW! FUCKING HELL!”
You were trapped—rain pelting at your head while your body remained pinned under a pile of building debris. The pressure on your chest was too heavy to speak, but you saw them in the distance. Price leaning over Simon. Blood seeping into the grooves of the wet pavement. Tears welled in your eyes as you reached with one arm, your vision spotting.
“MEDIC! PLEASE, PLEASE, WE NEED A MEDIC!”
You managed to emit a noise;
“No..”
“NO!”
You sat up, your back prickling with a cold sweat. You couldn’t breathe, you couldn’t breathe,
“I can’t breathe..”
The weight next to you rose, strong arms cradling your waist. You tensed, your heart pounding. “I can’t breathe.. please..” you hiccuped, drawing breath roughly.
“You can. Listen to me.” Simon’s voice cut through the darkness, his hands running up and down your side. “Listen. Feel my hands.. hear my voice.”
His voice was bleary with sleep, only furthering the tears spilling down your cheeks. You knew a full night’s sleep was rare for him, and your nightmares were a contributor.
“You’re safe.”
Those words finally anchored you back to earth. You all but collapsed into his arms, laying your head on his chest as he moved to lay flat again. Your breathing eased into a steady rhythm, still hoarse but not gasping anymore.
“Good..good.”
Simon somehow knew that saying less meant more; his touch washed away your panic while his carefully chosen words reached the corners of your mind that were so afraid of losing him.
“You were dying..couldn’t save you..” You whispered into the fabric of his shirt, at which he resumed rubbing your back.
“I’m okay. I’m right here..”
“I know..” emotion weighed down your voice as you reached for his head, thumbing through the shorter hair on the sides. He smelled like your body wash; he always said he’d replace his own eventually but he never did. You never insisted.
You woke up to an empty bed and the sound of quiet conversation at your door. Sitting up slowly, you spotted a mug of your favorite drink on the nightstand, a conflicted smile pulling at your cheeks. It felt wrong to be treated this way; with kindness. You shared this trait with Simon, you knew he often felt he was undeserving, but being on the other side of that felt just as helpless.
You grab your drink and wander into the kitchen, spotting Simon pulling a few items out of a takeaway bag. He paused when he spotted you, abandoning his task to walk over.
“Was about to give you a shove, you slept so well.” He kissed your temple, his hands resting on your hips.
“Yeah..I’m sorry about last night, I—I don’t know, I should get it under control-"
“What? You can’t control nightmares, sweetheart.”
The pet name fell so easily from his lips it made you want to hide away forever.
“I’ll always be here for you. Like you are for me, yeah? You get on my ass for sayin’ shit like that, so I’ll get on yours.” He smoothed the wrinkles in your sweater sleeve absentmindedly. “I care, you know?”
You nod quickly. “Yes.. I know.”
He leaned down to kiss you slowly, his thumb grazing your cheekbone before pulling back to guide you to the table.
The guilt melted a bit after his little deceleration, and breakfast was nice. You also got to watch him put way too much hot sauce on his food, coughing through his words while insisting he was fine. You laughed gently, retrieving some frozen fruit for his tongue.
Soon, too soon, it was time for you to head to work while Simon stayed and attempted to burn through his paperwork. Sometimes you came home while he was in a meeting, witnessing the hilarious sight of Simon Riley being outsmarted by a video call app.
You felt sort of numb today. You walked around base feeling like your legs weren’t all there.
You’d had nightmares before. He had comforted you in the dark before. And now, he had reassured you about the ordeal entirely. But if he wasn’t sure, if he was losing too much sleep, would he say anything? You tried to wring yourself out, busying yourself with small tasks in between meetings and even helping a visitor’s young girl that scraped her knee.
Nothing worked.
It only got worse the drive home, since your phone died and your radio had been stolen a few days ago. Traffic blocked the freeway that led out of town, leaving you to sit in a percolating mess of your thoughts.
How could you take away his sleep? He already went through so much, he has been through so much, the least he deserves is a peaceful place to rest. How could you do that? How could you do that to him? Why is he with you, why is he putting up with this, why are you living while he is surviving?
Why are you alive?
The car behind you blared their horn. Space had freed in front of you during your train of thought, and you pulled forward, weaving through cars, desperate to get home and yet terrified to walk through the door. When you did, you didn’t hear the tapping of his keyboard; just the soft wind you knew came from his office fan. You set down your things, making your way to that room. Peering through the open door, your heart sank.
He was sprawled on the small couch behind his desk, practically spilling off of the thing because of his size. He was sleeping. Drawing deep, steady breaths, his chest rising and falling peacefully. He must have been so tired he took a break to nap.
You exited the room as silently as you could, not being able to stop the tears welling in your eyes. Your thoughts raced, back and forth, back and forth.
You’re being dramatic.
This is proof.
He’s finally getting sleep because you’re not here.
You’re such a
It’s not that serious!
How could you do that?
Just stop crying.
What if you were never here again?
You threw up in your kitchen sink.
Saliva trailed from your bottom lip, and you could only watch, knowing you’d woken him up. Again. He could never find peace. You spit roughly, turning your back and sinking to the floor. You registered Simon’s footsteps, his figure in the doorway, the smell of your body wash.
“What’s wrong? Are you sick?”
His voice floated somewhere you couldn’t reach to. You noticed only now your breathing was frenzied, hoarse and uneven. Your hands trembled.
“Sweetheart, you’re scaring me, breathe.”
God, only you could manage to have a panic attack wrong. You must have made an upset noise through your hyperventilating, because he moved to face you.
“Come here.. come here.”
And then you were collapsing into his chest, sobbing harder with every breath. He didn’t say anything, holding you securely and rocking the both of you with an even rhythm
“It’s my fault..” your broken voice cracked through your tears.
“What? What’s your fault?” Simon ran a hand through your hair, still holding you to him.
“You..You’re never able to rest..” you hiccuped. “..while I’m here..you’re always taking care of me, you never get to sleep.”
You couldn’t stop now that you’d started.
“I shouldn’t be alive..”
Simon stiffened. He leaned forward to retrieve a dish towel, wiping away your tears, snot, and saliva so that you could see him clearly. You’d never seen his eyes so dark, so hurt.
“You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Do you hear me?” His voice was a murmur, like he was whispering a promise.
“I- I don’t..” You were about to break into a sob again when you felt his palm at your jaw.
“You have no idea how empty this world would be without you.” He paused. “It’s not like I’ve never thought about it too, but it doesn’t last forever.”
You looked up at his admission, your breathing beginning to steady. “You’ve thought about it?”
He nodded. “I promise, you will look back on this, and realize how much you appreciate everything. You only get one shot at being alive. You cannot cut it short, do you understand me?”
You nodded, unable to say a word.
“You have no control of what happens at night. When your brain starts playing tricks on you. I’ll be there every time, because I’ve lost count of how many times you’ve done it for me.”
You inhaled a shaky breath, reaching to touch his face. “I love you..”
“I love you.” He returned, pulling you close again. Anything else in the world seemed to dissolve; this was all you had ever hoped for.
#cod requests#call of duty modern warfare#cod mwii#call of duty#simon ghost riley#call of duty mw2#cod mw2#simon riley imagine#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley x reader
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Season 4 of supernatural spoilers ahead
Finished 4th season, and honestly it was the craziest so far.
I didnt like the intro. At all, it was eh. My favorite so far is the third one i think.
Finally got to meet Castiel and god, i love this man. I dont know how someone can be a badass and also be a clueless beaten dog at the same time, but he is just that. Can absolutely tell he likes Dean a lot.
The rest of the angels are assholes, tbh, maybe besides Anna, but I don't count her. She spent her life being a human so, she probably just understands what it's like.
Ruby disappointed me, not that I'm surprised, i had a bad feeling about her since the start of the season. I dont know, i cant shake the feeling that blonde Ruby was so much different than the season 4 Ruby.
The fact she made Sam drink demon blood is also so fucking mind blowing to me. And he did it, too, like a damn crackhead.
Speaking about Sam, he was so unlikable this season. The only reason i am not hating on him is because i am very biased from previous seasons. So i cant and wont hate him, no matter what.
But the whole season he was acting shitty, towards everyone, especially Dean. When Dean was right about everything all along.
Dean is still my favorite. I mean, he suffers so much and even when Sam pretty much wanted to abandon him, he didn't give up, definitely can tell hes the most mature and clever of the bunch.
I really like how much of Bobby there was in this season, i love this man, and im so glad the boys have an actual father figure.
To the episodes, i really liked the, going back in time episode, learning that Mary was a hunter was interesting. Honestly i dont know how i feel about that fact just yet.
Episodes 9 and 10, the ones centered about Anna were amazing, i just like Anna so much, and the development of her character is so cool i wish to see her more in the future.
"Sex and Violence" was an okay episode, the usual ghost hunting BUT i just wanted to point out the fact that a siren turned into the perfect little brother for dean instead of a hot chick, and thats so crazy to me idk.
The monster at the end of this book was wild. What do you mean Winchesters have their own freaking bible?!
Of course the finale was wild as always, like the angels trapping Dean, Castiel disobeying Zachariah and finally Sam breaking the final seal...fucking god, thats a lot for one episode lol
Also when Castiel cut his arm, for a second i thought hes gonna have Dean drink angel blood, as opposed to Sam whos drinking demon blood lmao, i dunno why it made sense in my head. But yeah, he didnt, and i liked that he made the angel repelling sign instead.
Ruby is dead, also, and im so not mad about it
#supernatural#spn#spnfandom#superwholock#tumblr#dean supernatural#dean winchester#supernatural dean#sam winchester#rant post#mini rant#ruby supernatural#castiel supernatural#supernatural season 4#Spotify
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
tagged by @dangerpronebuddie @diazsdimples @aroeddiediaz @underwaterninja13 @nmcggg @ladydorian05 thank you <33
How many works do you have on ao3?
right now it's 90! (57 of these are 911 lol)
What's your total ao3 word count?
535,450
What fandoms do you write for?
currently just 911, but I have some destiel and sambucky fics and who knows, I might get back to them at some point haha
Top 5 fics by kudos:
For a holiday (and forevermore)
I can't love you any more (than I do now)
I'd marry you with paper rings
the next best thing
There’s no way that it’s not going there (with the way that we’re looking at each other)
(they're all buddie and I just noticed that the top 4 are all over 1k kudos?? when did that happen lmao)
Do you respond to comments?
I do! sometimes it takes me a while bc i get lowkey overwhelmed lol but I always do!
What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
there's not a lot bc I prefer happy or hopeful endings, but I guess by post 6x10 fics? Fine and don't know what I'd do if your tomorrow never came idk lol
What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
most of my fics have happy endings, but I guess I'd say For a holiday (and forevermore)
Do you get hate on fics?
not really? got like one or two not very nice comments but generally no haha
Do you write smut?
yes I do 😁 not often and it always takes me forever but I do have two smut fics in the works (one buddie, one bucktommy lol)
Craziest crossover?
don't have any
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
no, as far as I know
Have you ever had a fic translated?
nope
Have you co-written a fic before?
no
All time favorite ship?
buddie
(ngl, bucktommy is a veeeeery close second rn🙈)
What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?
there's two that have been fighting me for so long they're lowkey abandoned now and tbh I don't know if I still want to finish them? one is a 5+1 nicknames, and the other just a silly idea about eddie flirting with buck since they met but buck being veeeery oblivious lol
What are your writing strengths?
I think (usually) I'm pretty good at staying true to the characters and not making them too ooc (and I know when it's ooc, okay, I have one wip rn where I just don't give a fuck, I'm writing it anyway lol), and I can get into their heads pretty well. Also I think I'm good at the cute fluffy stuff lol idk
What are your writing weaknesses?
there's probably a lot lol - rn the one that comes to mind is descriptions probably, which is why writing fanfic where we have established characters and settings is so much easier than og stuff haha
Thoughts on dialogue in another language?
I don't mind it but I don't do it a lot aside from a pet name here and there bc I just don't wanna get anything wrong lol
First fandom you wrote in?
for tv shows supernatural, but before that I did write rpf which i just wanna forget about lol
Favorite fic you've written?
rn it's three:
we don't know where this is going now (don't be afraid of heights, let me open your heart wide) - my tommy pov fic <3
I'm comin' back, don't let me go - buck driving/breakdown fic
baby, you drive me wild - car smut - might not be my best but it's my fave smut lol
tags: @elvensorceress @eddiebabygirldiaz @watchyourbuck @loserdiaz @evanbegins
@wildlife4life @lover-of-mine @monsterrae1 @weewootruck @loveyouanyway
@spagheddiediaz @rainbow-nerdss @epicbuddieficrecs @pirrusstuff @spotsandsocks
@rogerzsteven @hippolotamus @sunshinediaz @honestlydarkprincess @exhuastedpigeon
@jesuisici33 @steadfastsaturnsrings @buddieswhvre @theotherbuckley @daffi-990
@hoodie-buck @tizniz @bidisasterevankinard
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What Interview with the vampire characters are the marauders most like?
uhh okay so (this is gonna be long because im obsessed with iwtv.. & also btw spoilers for both the books & the show!!)
sirius- lestat (i think i said a while ago about how fanon sirius is lestat but like,, okay honestly its prob more a mix now i think on it more.. like i think i was sorta warped from louis trying to portray lestat as dumb & dramatic & stuff and like,, lestat IS very very much very dramatic but not actually dumb. at all. he's definitely the iwtv character that sirius is most like. plus @mrstellmeafuckingsecret 's thing about sirius getting with older guys??? literally lestat (with marius in the books. and akasha). also like,, EVERYONE being in love with the man??? so sirius. like no one can stop thinking bout him, even his fucking mother. oh yeah also not to mention the like childhood/home life of lestat with him being the wolfkiller & abused by his family and everything. plus also like,, idk the whole rockstar thing screams sirius & im not sure why but i mean. becoming a rockstar, pissing off & breaking like every law of your species??? it gives sirius fs) plus the whole.. abandonment issues... yeah.. )
james- daniel (okay... 1. i find it funny to think about... this is my main reasoning tbh. like. picturing james as this weird freaky human guy who's just. following around all these vampires who could kill him in an instant & he lowkey finds that hot... plus with thinking about the show,, silver fox james. asshole james. dickhead james. james getting basically kidnapped by peter (peter is under armand btw as you will see if you read on), james getting turned & then fucking going on tv with his cunty outfit & flipping off the news guy 😭😭 also going back to the books, james living on night island with peter & then he keeps just fucking running away & then going back to pete again & again...)
remus- louis (like with sirius as lestat, this is def a mix of fanon & canon sirius i feel... like. idk the way that louis portrays himself gives me very remus but with like. what we see otherwise (like lestat's retelling), its more fanon-y remus,, i don't think remus would be smashing sirius' head but fanon remus prob would. anyway, remus as this depressed lad that gets enamoured by sirius whos lowkey stalking him ?? yes 🫶🫶. then also louis always trying to run away & he never says ily?? v remus. plus never being able to get over him <33 also like.. bookworm louis & shitty photographer louis & always getting manipulated by his bfs louis?? v remus)
peter- armand (freaky arse weird rat man 🧍♂️.. also just like. he gets so obsessed and in love & he just wants someone to worship lowkey & thats so peter of him. but like. hes too weird & freaky for most ppl. also i think peter should do the blender thing that armand does cause its cunty & funny. peter grew up in a muggle environment to me, but i do still think he'd love technology & like random appliances. also yknow.. general betraying ppl shit & being such a weird little guy & most manipulative mf ever)
lily- i was gonna say lily just to be funny but like.. nah I'll say it properly. madeleine. (i mean in the show. ginger bisexual cunty woman who speaks her mind & can hold her own? very lily already. but also madeleine having that sorta relationship with the nazi soldier (snape...) & being harassed cause of it. & also that bit where armand asks her how she'll kill & she's just like.. survival of the fittest yknow. very lily to me. she's also like extremely witty which is a big lily quality. plus she sticks up for what she believes & doesn't take the easy way out even though it would've saved her life.
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I would love to hear more abt your college pre-egg-breaking fiddauthor thoughts if you'd be open to it
oh BOY would I
so when I think about college fiddauthor nowadays I mainly think about both my own experiences with ~navigating identity~ and how I would approach a gay FTM relationship from a semi-realistic 1970's angle, where you start to see a lot of what you'd call "milestones" I guess in LGBT history and public awareness. wait okay here's something I said to mer that can set a precedent for what I'm talking about
when it comes to me and my own journey of self discovery irt sexuality and transness, I feel like those two things are very intertwined, because the concept of identity in my eyes is very socially motivated. I've previously identified as a nonbinary lesbian and a transgender gay man respectively before getting to the point I'm at now, and don't feel like either of those things were incorrect necessarily, just how I felt at the time (and what I wanted out of a relationship, really). I think I literally got an ask ages ago questioning how I went from one to the other but Idk I don't think the gender journey is as simple or "logical" as people coming from a hetero-patriarchal perspective (that's a mouthful) seem to think.
and, And, from a Historical perspective, FTM experiences and butch lesbian experiences have Always been very intertwined, especially back in the early 70's when more people were starting to have some awareness (even in LGBT spaces) of this thing known as the Transgender Lifestyle. I'm flattening things quite a bit here and I know for a fact there's a lot of variation between experiences, especially depending on your social circles, but from what I can glean a lot of the time transgender men weren't very well known and so a lot of the time you would just ID as a butch lesbian and/or present as a man socially, sometimes for safety reasons. and there's a lot of overlap there too that continues into contemporary transmasc spaces today :]
historical justification aside I basically think college would be a major turning point for self-discovery in both of their lives, but more-so for fiddleford than ford? I've always assumed based on everything we've seen that fidds was basically the only friend ford had in college, which definitely would have influenced him in important ways, but other than that I think he invested most of his time in studying and developments in gender were an afterthought. ford's FTM identity starts from a place of "failing to be a woman" and then develops with his pride in being a huge weirdo. in my mind that can only really happen once he's in gravity falls and has basically sacrificed his connections with other people/the world to live as his truest self, whether that's researching anomalies or living as a man.
fiddleford, however, I always think of from the perspective of someone bucking to societal expectations for safety reasons. this is because of a lot of things: ford's possible feelings of abandonment in favor of Normalcy (who can forget "Go back to your doting family and a life of fear and compromise!"), his jumping into a nuclear family immediately out of college, But also packing up and driving to oregon in a matter of days after ford asks for his help... when he has a kid who could be no older than 5 or 6 at home...? I sort of see his presentation as a foil to ford's, trying to mimic cishetero ("hetero") normalcy vs. being the Lone Transsexual Freak. I've gotten horribly off topic from the college thing hang on
basically I imagine them in their uni days like two weird butch gay women that are just, totally socially unapproachable. fiddleford is the more outgoing of the two as he's been voted "most likely to actually have other friends" in my mind, so if anyone was going to gay & lesbian student association meetings it would've been him, but otherwise ford is too busy ignoring his feelings. "I don't care if I'm a man or a woman I'm too busy studying. go away." but of course they find enough solace in eachother's company and their different-but-distinctly-similar weirdness that it forms an unbreakable transgender bond. freak4freak if you will. fidds settles on a bisexual identity without thinking about it too hard because honestly the conclusion here is that it doesn't matter if his roommate is a woman or a man he just knows he needs to do terrible things to him over d&d&md (sorry) (not really that sorry though.)
it's actually funny you bring this up because I'd been workshopping a short comic set in their college era that touches on this stuff a lot. not sure when that will ever get done but I can tell you it's. uhm
yeah they're kind of weird.
#lab notes#askbox#less well-formed thoughts than usual since I did a lot of driving today#but hey..... the thoughts are very authentic at least#lab discussion#gfposting
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All of my hyperfixations - past and present - are merging into a chaotic bundle of the Triple Ts (terribly traumatized twinks) and slowly driving me insane.
I can’t focus on my day to day life when I’m constantly thinking of terribly traumatized twinks (not all of them are twinks BUT THEY ARE ALL GAY)
Like genuinely how am I supposed to focus on such trivial matters like pre-calc or my collapsing relationship with my father when all I can think about is:
how Heartstopper isn’t just a cringe teen show, it’s a beautiful representation of being young and queer, and how struggling with mental health can severely impact your most formative years - Charlie had friends and yet still felt completely alone and like he couldn’t burden them with his pain because mental illness fucks with your brain so deeply, it’ll make you believe you have nothing and no one when you may actually have something and someone
or how Dead Boy Detectives isn’t just a silly ghost show (although it’s a wonderful silly ghost show), its a show about how friendship and love can be the most powerful thing in your arsenal (aside from a magic cricket racket) and how your past can haunt (ha) you and how the constant fear of becoming who you hate most in the world will always linger in the back of your mind but your true family can keep you safe and help you heal, and how fucking impossible it is to be gay or a POC at the wrong place, in the wrong fucking time - and maybe you won’t be able to find any peace in your current situation but there is peace out there somewhere, waiting for you patiently. (Charles and Edwin found their peace in their own homebrew afterlife, but seeing as we are mere servants of the mortal plane and not transdimensional beings, we shall have to suffice with sculpting our own peace out of this terrifying world because we fully damn well can, and we deserve it)
or how she-ra isn’t some goofy kid show; it’s a show about how being groomed and manipulated can destroy a child’s psyche so much that it will take years to rebuild (also it’s gay as fuck). catra wasn’t cruel (okay maybe she was just a bit but hear me out guys- I’m due for a rewatch and all I remember is I love that woman more than life itself), she was abandoned again and again and again and all she wanted was for adora to stay, so she wouldn’t be alone anymore, not again. And finally- FINALLY she stayed (giving us one of the most cinematic scenes in history [so just this once, adora: stay]). Adora and Catra are two sides of the same coin. They were both subject to the mental and physical torture of Shadow Weaver and they both responded in different ways due to their own personalities and differences in how they were treated - but they found each other in the end, and always protected each other because that’s what best friends (specifically the really really gay ones) do.
or how the owl house ALSO isn’t a silly kids show, but instead another show about abuse and trauma and growing up queer, and how healing and freeing acceptance is (oh and also some more child soldiers). Amity was so mean to people because meanness and cruelty was all she knew, until Luz took the time to dig a bit deeper and find the real Amity buried deep inside - and how Luz and Amity, even at such a young age, in such a dangerous and confusing world, were ALWAYS there for each other, no matter what
or how 9-1-1 is deeper than just a random fire fire show. It depicts all sorts of personal struggles like post partum depression, PTSD, anxiety, trauma, child neglect/abuse, depression, abandonment, death, foster care, divorce, and ofc: suppressed queerness/comp het! (Eddie literally put Buck in his will and made him the designated legal guardian for Christopher - if that ain’t gay, idk what is)
or how criminal minds has one of the most tragically beautiful found family tropes whilst being a show about the literal scum of the earth? How even in such gruesome circumstances, these people banded together and made the most beautiful family.
or how Percy Jackson is a kids/teen book but delves into such deep and tragic topics so well. Child soldiers, child abuse, being queer at the wrong place and time, coming to terms with being queer, child soldiers, DID I MENTION THE CHILD SOLDIERS??
or how Epic uses expert music theory and lyricism to convey a gorgeous tragedy in the best way I’ve ever seen
or how the grishaverse had so much potential, and is a brilliant literary universe but was BUTCHERED on screen, wasting one of the best casts I’ve ever seen
Genuinely how do I move on with my life when I can’t stop thinking about this (and so many more thoughts that I don’t have the energy to write out at 3:30AM)
#heartstopper#dead boy detectives agency#charles rowland#edwin payne#she ra and the princesses of power#she ra adora#she ra catra#shadow weaver#the owl house#luz noceda#amity blight#lumity#9 1 1 buddie#criminal minds#percy jackson and the olympians#percy jackson and the heroes of olympus#epic the musical#grishaverse#shadow and bone show#six of crows#shadow and bone#charlie spring#nick nelson#evan buckley#eddie diaz#percy jackson#annabeth chase#grover underwood#camp halfblood#i’m so good at tagging guys
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Idek what to say rn.
Idek if I should make this post...
I'm so tired.
I feel like my life is just casually falling apart, no matter how hard I try to get it back on track. Something is always going wrong or being stripped away from me due to the cruel and evil and selfish nature of this world. Every time I think things are getting better, everything just gets shot down from every possible angle.
I've always had a rough life, but it's starting to become too much. At one point I looked at the story of Job and just knew the pain was temporary... knew eventually that God would bring things together for good like He did with Job. But now? I don't even know if I can keep having hope that I will ever be rewarded on this earth as Job was. I don't know if God has anything for me here from this point forward. It feels like my purpose has been fulfilled and I'm just waiting to finally be picked up and taken home.
Legitimately, I just want to go home. I don't belong here. Never have... never will. I'm tired of being in physical, mental, and spiritual pain on a daily basis... I'm tired of this life and everything it brings. I didn't sign up for this. And while I'm happy to push through and allow God to work through me... to be here to fulfill His purpose... idk how much more I can take.
And honestly, my genuine care and love for people only makes it harder. Knowing that some of these individuals I would die for are going to willingly choose eternity separate from God... knowing that some of these people will want me dead just for how much I care and want to warn them in hopes they'll be okay and change their minds.
I'm tired of having to live in this world. Having no place to even temporarily fit in. Too autistic, loyal, and serious about following God word for word for the Christian community... too much of a child of God for the autistic community... too loving and genuine for this evil, lying world. I can't wait to be done.
At this point, I either want to know what God wants me to do, or for Him to end my suffering if I have fulfilled my purpose. I want to either be able to bring people to Him and convince people to save their precious souls... or be with Him, face to face, where I belong, as soon as possible if the former isn't meant to be.
I honestly don't know how to fully express or explain what I'm feeling... I don't even fully comprehend what I want or what I'm feeling. I just know that I'm so tired and done. I want to go home.
But I also don't want to abandon the people I care about to fall into Satan's snares... even if the second I try and say something, everyone besides God just immediately abandons me. I've lost almost every friend I've made, and those I haven't lost yet either aren't saved, are lukewarm, or have nothing in common to bond about other than our pain. Although even then... I don't really know anyone that has a pain quite like mine.
I can't even find joy in any of my hobbies... I basically have no hobbies left unless you count sleeping all day and having mental and emotional breakdowns all night. Even WITH God, I feel so bored and empty in this cruel world that makes it nearly impossible not to stumble and screw something up. I just want to go home. I want to be at peace for a change.
The only time I even feel a glimmer of peace is when I go mentally numb. When my emotions shatter... when I'm indifferent to the pain, both mentally and physically... when I feed into my depressive state. Maybe this is God's plan for me? I don't know anymore.
What I do know though is that I will never stop trusting Him... no matter what is thrown my way or how much it hurts and makes me want to fade from existence. So I guess I'll sit here, numb and broken, waiting to see what God is eventually going to make from my shattered pieces.
I don't have much left to give... but I give it all to Him.
If you see me disappear from the internet for extended periods... this is why. It's always been why honestly. And I think I might be done trying to use fiction and virtual realities to cope. It has only ever made things worse anyways.
I have no idea if or when I might end up posting art or stories again. Sorry to disappoint.
#mental health#christianity#christian mental health#genuine talk#sorry for the inactivity... no idea when or if it will change#im not okay#i would be happy to answer questions unbelievers might have though#that's one of the few things keeping me going
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